Epoximise
by fangirlofeverythingunderthesun
Summary: Musketeers Hogwarts!AU Follow the boys through their misadventures as they attend Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.


**AN: I will soon upload another version of this to AO3 which is illustrated**

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><p>It was a hot August that year and the streets were stuffy and suffocating due to the crowds. Porthos was seated against the wall of a shaded alleyway where it was cooler and he was able to sit and contemplate what to do for the day. He would maybe try and find Flea or maybe Charon...<p>

His musings were cut short by the entrance of the alleyway darkening. He looked up to see a figure standing there dressed in a fashion that most people would think of as odd, though having lived in the court of miracles his whole life, Porthos was used to people wearing all sorts of clothing.

"Porthos I believe?" The man asked with a kind smile. Immediately Porthos was on his guard, he'd never seen this man before and yet he knew his name. He nodded slowly, eyeing the man suspiciously as he reached into his robes and pulled out an envelope, extending it to Porthos. Warily Porthos took the letter and examined it;

_M Porthos  
>Court of Miracles<em>

Perplexed as to why anybody would be writing a letter to the likes of him, Porthos turned it over and tore into it, his curiosity overruling his initial weariness. There were two pages inside;

**HOGWARTS SCHOOL of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY**

**Headmaster: Louis XIII**

Dear M. Porthos,  
>We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.<br>Term begins on 1 September. We await your owl by no later than 31 July.

Your sincerely,

**Anne of Austria  
>Deputy Headmistress<strong>

A school... Porthos had never been to a school before. He had taught himself how to read and write - it had been one of his proudest achievements, he didn't know anybody else in the court who could do those things.

But why then would a school want him? And the witchcraft... everybody knew what happened to witches. They burned. Porthos wasn't sure that he liked the sound of it. But then again a school promised a life away from the streets.

He looked up at the man - or wizard apparently - "Who are you then?"

"I am a teacher at the school, I am here to help you get your things for school."

"Why should I believe you? How do I even know that all this magic stuff is even real?"

The man said nothing, instead he walked over to a barrel and pulled a thin stick from within the folds of his robes. Something in the back of Porthos' mind dimly registered that this was probably a wand.

Swishing the wand at the barrel, the wizard muttered something and the barrel was gone, replacing it stood a pig. It looked around bewildered and was about to bolt when suddenly it was a barrel again. The wizard looked at Porthos and raised an eyebrow.

"Was that satisfactory?" He asked. Porthos nodded but said nothing, his eyes transfixed on the barrel.

"Can I?"

smiling, the wizard nodded and stood aside. Getting up, Porthos walked to the barrel and lifted the lid. Empty. Not a pig in sight. "So is this school real as well then?"

"Yes."

"And they really want me to go there?"

The wizard nodded, "And will you accept?"

Porthos thought for a while. He'd heard stories of men who snatched children, and someone of Porthos' origins would be particularly vulnerable. But the magic would explain a few things that had happened in his life. Like the time he'd been running away from a man who'd caught him pick-pocketing. He'd reached a dead end and just as he was certain that his goose was cooked, he suddenly found himself on the other side of the high wall with no idea how he'd managed it.

Going would mean leaving Charon and Flea but he could still come back and see them right? There couldn't always be school.

"Alright," he said "But any funny business and I'll run away screaming witchcraft."

The wizard smiled indulgently, seeming unfazed by the threat. "Then we leave immediately."

"What, now?" Porthos had thought that that he would at least get to say goodbye to his friends.

"A brief stop for goodbyes then, but we really must be off. It took me a while to find you so we are rather late and you'll need to get your supplies before you leave."

"I don't have any money for supplies."

"We have taken that into account, which I will inform you on later, but first shall we see about those goodbyes?"

. x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x .

Porthos ran around the whole of the Court of Miracles. Into all the usual places, every nook and cranny, any small crevice, but Flea and Charon weren't there. They must have gone out.

Porthos' heart sank. What would they think when he disappeared? Would they go looking for him? There was no use in writing a note, they couldn't read. Crestfallen, he walked out into the main street where the wizard was waiting for him.

"They weren't there."

The wizard looked at Porthos in sympathy. "I'm sure that we could sort something." He said, putting a comforting hand on Porthos' shoulder.

. x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x .

Porthos had never seen such wonders. Shops of all kinds took up both houses and stalls alike and their contents amazed Porthos beyond words. There were bottles and jars of all sorts of shapes and colours, huge thick books, owls of every breed Porthos could think of as well as many he'd never seen before. A shop for robes, one for broomsticks, another full of parchment and quills. Porthos could barely take it all in fast enough.

A clinking brought his attention back to his side where he saw the teacher extending a pouch to him.

"It has been decided that the school should lend you enough money to get your school things as well as other expenses that you may encounter. You will then pay it back when you are able to, no interest."

"A-are you sure?" Porthos asked, taking the pouch uncertainly. He looked inside and saw more money there than he'd ever seen in one place in his whole life. He'd never stolen more than he'd had to (the rest he won fair and square in poker) but even all that together wouldn't amount to this. "You're actually letting me have all this?" He asked with wide eyes, looking up at the wizard.

The wizard smiled, "You'll probably want me to explain them to you." He picked out three of the coins; a large gold one, a smaller silver one and the smallest, a bronze one. "Now this," he explained, pointing to the gold one, "is a Galleon, and this silver one is a Sickle, and the last one here is a Knut. There's seventeen Sickles to a Galleon and twenty-nine Knuts to a Sickle, it's easy enough to remember."

"Seventeen Sickles to a Galleon, twenty-nine Knuts to a Sickle." Porthos repeated, he should be able to remember that, he had rather a good memory.

"Well then let's go and get your school things."

"But how will I know what I need?"

"There's a list on the second page of the letter."

The second page, of course! Porthos had forgotten about it completely. He pulled the letter from where he's kept it safe in his shirt and pulled the second page from it:

**HOGWARTS SCHOOL of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY**

Uniform

_First-year students will require:  
>1. Three sets of plain work robes (black)<em>_2. One plain pointed hat (black) for day wear  
>3. One pair of protective gloves (dragon hide or similar)<em>_4. One winter cloak (black with silver fastenings)  
>Please note that all pupil's clothes should carry name tags.<em>

Course Books

_All students should have a copy of the following:  
><em>The Standard Book of Spells (Grade 1) _by Miranda Goshawk  
><em>A History of Magic _by Bathilda Bagshot  
><em>Magical Theory _by Adalbert Waffling  
><em>A Beginner's Guide to Transfiguration _by Emeric_ Switch  
>One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi <em>by Phyllida Spore<br>_Magical Drafts and Potions _by Arsenius Jigger  
><em>Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them_ by Newt Scamander  
><em>The Dark Forces: A Guide to Self-Protection_ by Quentin Trimble_

Other Equipment

_1 wand  
>1 cauldron (pewter, standard size 2)<br>__1 set glass or crystal phials  
>1 telescope<br>1 set brass scales_

_Students may also bring, if they desire, an owl OR a cat OR a toad.  
>PARENTS ARE REMINDED THAT FIRST YEARS ARE NOT ALLOWED THEIR OWN BROOMSTICK.<em>

. x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x .

The first thing they did was get a wand. Porthos got a nervous feeling as he walked into the shop, unsure as to what he should expect. There was an elderly man behind the counter with snow white hair. He smiled as he saw Porthos in a friendly manner that made Porthos feel that he liked the man.

"Another first year?" The elderly man guessed "My, you've left it rather late to be getting all your things, haven't you?" He asked good naturedly.

"Took me quite some time to find him," said the wizard, "kept moving about all over the place." He then turned to Porthos, "This is Mr. Ollivander" He explained, "the best wandmaker in the business."

Ollivander smiled in a humble manner. "Would you put your wand arm out for me?" He asked Porthos. Porthos guessed that this was the same arm that he wrote with and held it out. A tape measure started to measure it in all sorts of ways and Porthos couldn't take his eyes off it as it did this all of it's own accord. Once it was done, Ollivander humed and then disappeared between shelves stacked high full of thin boxes. He soon reappeared holding one of them and opening it, presenting Porthos with the wand from within.

"Alder with a dragon heartstring core." He explained, "Give it a swish."

Porthos took the wand. It felt odd in his hand. He glanced at Ollivander before shifting his grip a little on the wand and swishing it. Nothing happened and it was swiftly replaced in it's box. Obviously not the desired reaction, Porthos thought, slightly disheartened.

"We'll try another."

Disappearing back amongst the shelves, Ollivander soon reappeared with a second box, looking much like the first.

"This one is rowan with a core of unicorn hair tail." He explained to Porthos as he handed him the wand. Porthos felt a warm feeling as he held it, there was something that he lied about this one which he couldn't quite put his finger on. He swished. There was a spark and a nearby pile of the boxes was knocked over.

Porthos was stricken, "I'm very sorry, I hadn't mean to!"

"That's alright." Ollivander said as if it was something that happened often. There was some hint of proudness in his eye though.

"You found that match awfully quick." The wizard said.

"Indeed, I do believe it took us twelve attempts before we found your match."

The wizard laughed. Porthos smiled, there was something satisfying about holding this, no, _his_ wand. If possible then he was smiling even more once he had paid for it and they were leaving Ollivander's for the next shop.

. x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x . x .

At last there was only one thing left on the list and Porthos found himself following the wizard into a shop full of owls and all sorts of other creatures. A clang startled Porthos and he whirled around to come face to face with the expectant face of one of the owls. it nudged the bars of its cage again and continued to look at him expectantly.

Porthos grinned, "I think I'd like this one," he told the shopkeeper, "If that's alright."

"Certainly." The shopkeeper smiled amusedly at him and came to view his choice. "Ah yes, the Northern Hawk Owl, an excellent choice."

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><p><strong>AN:**

**# Since Hogwarts is set in Britain and the Muskteers is set in France, I have decided to simply fail to mention any city names etc. (apart from the Court of Miracles and Hogsmede etc.) That way it doesn't matter.  
># I have not named the teacher because he becomes irrelevant after this chapter.<br># I just made up that whole money thing for convenience, don't mind me.  
># Yeah, I know that most of those books were written in the 20th century, but let's just pretend that they're around now.<strong>**# The Ollivander here is an ancestor of the one in the Harry Potter books, I have decided to name him Garrett.  
># I know that the Northern Hawk Owl is not native to Britain, or even France for that matter, but you will soon discover that neither are half the owls that will appear in the fanfic, I just really like those owls.<br>**


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